Don't you hate it when you steal the wrong goat?

I figured that football and stories of goat theft gone wrong don’t intersect all that often, so it needed to be discussed here.

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My dad always told me if you really wanted to get somebody’s goat

watch where they tie it.


it happens

Is there some sort of decoy goat for this very situation and that’s who they snagged? The stunt double goat? This just seems strange.

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The Naval Academy has a family tree of goats that they pick the current mascot from. Army stole an older goat that used to be the mascot, but it’s his descendent who is the mascot now. I guess they retire the goat after a few seasons of trauma from screaming crowd noise and abduction attempts.

I see. Okay well that is actually a very humane and well thought out process. Joke is on Army I guess. Suckers.

Given their familiarity…intimate familiarity with goats…one would expect Army pukes to know their way around the pen, so to speak.

This from my SIL Marine Gunny sitting next to me.

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Also, it’s a good time to trot this old chestnut out since it’s related…kinda

Historians, through a research agreement with evolutionary biologists have determined Why the Scots adopted the wearing of Kilts instead of pants, many hundreds of years ago.

Through generations of natural selection, Scottish sheep’s hearing is now so good, their descendants can hear the sound of a zipper from 500 yards away


Kinda like marines in a fox hole together. From your friendly army cavalry scout veteran.

When it’s Saturday night and you’re desperate, is there such thing as a “wrong” goat?..I think not.


GOAT Team 6 made a boo boo


Totally. was just about to start a satanic ritualistic sacrifice when I realized Timmy stole the wrong goat.

We were all like, Dang Timmy what do you want us to accidentally conjure Zozo instead of Asteroth?

We laughed and we laughed


Worst thing about goats is you gotta turn 'em around to kiss 'em, or so I’ve been told.

So is this like when we drafted the wrong Gronkowski?