Stafford's 2021 Diary

I’ve finally had enough. The team’s at rock bottom, I’m not getting any younger, and Kelly wants to be somewhere warmer. I’m asking for a trade.

I received an “anonymous” message to meet “McMe” down in Mexico. Sounds like a great chance to get away to somewhere warm with Kelly and the kids.

Met with “McMe” down at the bar. We had a great conversation, he talked a lot about what could be accomplished, so incredibly detailed, he’s really knowledgeable. Can’t remember when I had so much tequila, so some of its a bit hazy, but I know my preferred destination.

It happened! I’m heading to LA, and we’re all so excited! The future is bright! Talked to Sean all day long, I thought I was excited, he’s going on nonstop!

Training camp has been an adjustment. So much talent on this team, Sean is incredibly detailed, lots of communication and he sees so much. Big change from Fatty P. So thankful I’m not in New England.

First preseason game, that was a really different experience. Sean’s very detailed in his playcalling, it’s a bit distracting, and I missed a couple blitzes, but I’m sure I’ll adjust.

3rd regular season game, and we’re 3-0! This team is legit and we can go the distance. Really difficult to concentrate on the adjustments with Sean talking right up to the cutoff on every play.

Game 6, 5-1, on top of the world and the division. I’m starting to become thankful the league mandates a cutoff on that frigging mic in my helmet, Sean is a motor mouth. You’d think I never read a defense before.

Game 9, 7-2. We’re rocking out, but we need to make some adjustments if we want to sustain this, teams are catching on. Trying to tell Sean, but he won’t shut his mouth long enough for me to complete a sentence. Frustrating, but we’re winning. Still, I miss Daryl right about now.

Game 12, 9-3. The only reason we won the last game is because I ripped that mic out of my helmet during the 4th quarter and started calling my own plays out there. This guy is reminding me more of Fatty P everyday, same single mindedness, but He. Never. Shuts. Up.

Game 16, 11-5. 49ers won the division on the last game because the guy who replaced me in Detroit was in Glenn’s ear the whole game and he knew EVERY play before that Squirrel-with-a-crackpipe I have for a coach got done with his monolog in my head. Goff’s chilling and relaxed, guy must have the patience of a Saint to put up with jabber-jaw for 4 years. Lions aren’t going to the playoffs, but they took us to the woodshed today. Talked to Goff after the game and asked if this is how things were for him. He just laughed like a man escaped from Shawshank. What the hell have I gotten myself into? At least I’m back in the playoffs.

Playoffs, 0-1. We lost to the GD Packers! GD Repeat, the Head Coach I’m stuck with, just threw me under the bus during the post-game for his P.O.S. game plan! I finally snapped, his nose looks great smashed flat on his face with blood all over. I can’t believe I just did that. I’m so fired. I should have gone with Fatty P to the Pats. Everyone’s going to think I just spent the last twelve years living in San Quentin, or Detroit…

Just got called into the GM’S office, here comes my walking papers. I’m so screwed. I miss the Lions.

Shocked to the core. Sat down with Les. He asked me to sit down. He asked me what I thought about Daryl Bevell as a head coach candidate. Can’t wait for next year…


That’s not too far from how I see it in the coming year for the Rams.

I suppose they could make it back to SB and I’d like to see Stafford win big, yet I don’t see it happening. A leaky OL without Whitworth, a defense with new coaches, a significant injury to any of their Big 3, their scouting department raided–their path is razor thin.

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Easily the best post I’ve read in 2021. Hilarious and I wouldn’t be surprised at all. I also can’t believe how much time it must have taken you to come up with all that. lol

Please continue to give us more Stafford Diary entries in the future.


Great stuff TC!

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Great post! I agree with stelhenboyd57 Please more Stafford Diary entries in the future.


It all popped in my head at once. Life of a writer, :laughing:.

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I will try as time and a three year old permits, :laughing:.

That might end up being nonfiction. It’s basically exactly how I assumed it’ll go in LA. He may prove us wrong, we shall see.

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Bump, Just reflecting on how good this post was. Any chance we can get an update TCLion?


11/28/2021 - We just lost our third in a row and I’ve thrown my 3rd pick six in as many weeks. McVay is totally predictable in his play calls and yet he has me seeing ghosts everywhere from our 20 hour film sessions…These days I have to ask for permission to take a piss at home and at work. OyVay…


You missed the breakfast Witt coffe kup that stafford and kupp do daily

it’s funny, but Matt needs to take care of and face his back issues and other problem areas , take time for himself getting better, feeling better, and playing better . Not playing and messing up due to these injuries and the pain, don’t try gutting it out and playing tough and well mess the f up WHILE really ticking off everyone ‘around’ you buddy. your not 25 anymore, and your body reacts different as you age. get it looked at !

Nobody is questioning anything about stafford , only thing is in pressured big games he never comes through .

It’s too bad the Lions didn’t draft Rogers. They could have ruined his career and he would just be another Joey Harrington, Andre Ware, or Chuck Long

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November 28th. First year I got to spend Thanksgiving with my family since playing in the league. Kelly asked me how the turkey was, and I made the mistake of saying it was a bit dry, she flung the steaming hot gravy in my face and stormed out. Family time.

I. Hate. Aaron. RODGERS!

New team, new uniform, same result. The Packers have my number. Can’t wait until that Holistic A-Hole is gone. I threw another pick 6, never saw the guy, it was where the gravy burned my eyes.

McCrackhead is over on the sidelines assaulting my ears on every play. We’ve lost three in a row and I’m hurting. I’m hoping to turn things around. That Wolford kid gives me the creeps. He’s always staring. Luckily, no one in the NFC looks like they want to be in the playoffs this year. If I had this record in Detroit right now, they’d be building a statue. In LA, they’re trying to figure out what’s wrong with me.

Until next time…


Lol Kelly is ruthless, first the pretzels, now the gravy! When will this gravy train end.


Lol, this a gold

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No doubt, we will most certainly need an end of year report from Stafford’s diary