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UCLA has been thinking about firing Kelly for awhile and he hates recruiting so that’s probably why he left. He’s kinda become the Don Brown of offense and we’ll see what happens at Osu.
They’re a little behind Mark D’Antonio.
“I just want to coach football”
That sums up the move, and the current state of the NCAA
Who would want to recruit now?
Here’s what I imagine it looks like.
HC on Zoom call- Well, young man, if you come to Altered State University, you will be surrounded by a beautiful campus, thriving college life, excellent academics and professors, and a chance to make a difference in the world beyond your college years.
QB Recruit- Yo, my parents aren’t here, man.
HC- Oh good, well in that case, let me send over the financial prospectus of our NIL booster funders as attachment A, the schedule for all the Academic Advisors in the AD who will be writing your papers/taking your tests, because who wants to go to class, right? Also, here are the OnlyFans pages of our Comfort Girls…oh, did I say Comfort Girls? I meant Recruiting Coordinators…yeahh…also our Ad Agency, our “Nutrition Assitants” and of course our Concierge Department who has contacts at all of the local car dealerships, steakhouses and swag stores…
QB Recruit-Yawn…I don’t see the resumes of any of your…you know…
HC- Damn, almost forgot! Thanks for reminding me. Profiles of our Wolves…you saw Pulp Fiction right?
QB Recruit- Damn you old! Who?
HC- I’m 37 for criminey sakes…Fixers!
QB Recruit- Yeah, thats what Im talkin about…man gotta drag race while he still can w/o jeapordizing his contract!
HC- Oh, and lastly, of course, a rundown of our offensive system and a few plays from the playbook, to get you jazzed about the team!
QB Recruit- C’mon coach, you know I’m just gonna freelance that shit, no one gets drafted no more by finding their 3rd read!
Besides, I’ m gonna just jump into that Transfer Portal if we don’t look like we are making a New Years Day Bowl Game dude! Gotta Protect The Brand!
I’ll look it over and have my people call you if Im alright with it. I gotta go…photoshoot at 330 yo. Later!
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