I may have performed my last demonic summoning

totally forgot to close the circle with salt. Now Morgoth escaped the containment spell and is wreaking all sorts of havoc in my townhome complex. how am I supposed to shower when only blood comes out of the fixture now? so lame.


Total rookie move, SMH


Always thinking about yourself. Monday was probably his day off and he wanted to sleep in after creating all that evil on Sunday.

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You need a silmaril and a broom.

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is that like The NFL Draft !?

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You need to watch Twilight again

that movie is sooo barf-worthy, hate that atrocity of a movie.

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As a wolf I can see why you’d have strong opinions


The demon who got through my salt circle looks like this. He shows up on Sunday afternoons, sits on my couch, drinks all my beer, and makes me do unspeakable things to him every time the Lions score. My lips are chapped beyond repair and my bunghole makes a whistling sound whenever it’s pointed into the wind. But I do consider him to be a good friend.



Incredibly hard to exorcise.

Seems to be the offspring of Screwtape and Azazel.

Susceptible to curses.

Dipped in the river Lethe, the opposite of Achilles.


Oh, this just in, I’m ignorant

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Big Natty looks older in that pic than I imagined he would


Ahyahusca is a powerful drug!

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OP you can’t do that !!! what am I supposed to do with my Sundays !?

Good call but this isn’t BigNatty. When BN comes over he’s the one leaving with chapped lips.

I wonder how his frog licking tour is going in Columbia?

I’ve learned to tame the demon who comes to my house with Black Velvet. She comes disguised as my mother-in-law and makes guttural sounds until the sound of ice hitting a glass is heard. Wise to make sure the glass is never totally empty, a lesson I learned long ago.


Oh man, I have fond memories of Black Velvet from college. That was my jam. The bottle art was perfect. I’m a big fan of Canadian whiskey in general, but I always genuinely thought Black Velvet was shockingly good for the price.

In IOWA Black Velvet and Busch Light rule. I prefer to drink small batch whiskey and stouts or porters.