Fever dreams, explosive diarrhea, and Sam Darnold: Are NFL teams dumber than we think?

The Den
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I’m coming out of a bad fever from yesterday (you ever had it where it comes out of both ends, and you’re praying to the all mighty for deliverance?). So anyway, I’m laying on the cold, unforgiving bathroom floor, clutching to both the toilet and what’s left of life, and who pops into my head?

Sam Darnold.

He’s had the sort of career where it’s fathomable I’m not the only one this has happened to.

Anyway, it got me thinking: are NFL teams ■■■■■■■ stupid?

No, I mean that. I do.

We spent enormous amounts of digital ink here. Entire cottage industries have spun up around professional football to provide endless analysis of data and conjecture. There’s close to around a billion or three podcasts dedicated to professional football.

And all of us, myself included, sit back and say, “I mean, most of this is bullshit, but at least the TEAMS know what they’re doing.”

But is Sam Darnold the exception to the rule, or evidence to the contrary?

Because it wasn’t just the Jets, Panthers, 49ers, and Vikings that gave up on Darnold. It was probably 15-20 other teams who needed a quarterback and said, “LOL, no.” And this ■■■■■■ goes out and wins a goddamn Super Bowl one year after crushing it with Minnesota (we can dispel of Sam being a flake in crunch moments—dude didn’t learn that shit in a year. Kevin O’Connell might just be an idiot).

Same logic can apply to Daniel Jones, Baker Mayfield, Geno Smith (to a degree), and, yes, Jared Goff. But who ELSE could that logic have applied to had they been given the right opportunity? Mac Jones? Zach Wilson? Josh Rosen? Justin Fields (I know, still in flight).

Anyway, it’s just crazy that at the most important position on the football field, the degree to which most of the league simply … failed makes me question all the things.

Could be that.

Could also be the fever.

PS — @wolfcub36 this one is for you

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I think if I had it coming out of both ends and thought of Sam Darnold, it might start coming out of my eyes and ears. But I hope you feel better amigo. Not fun.

Goff is a better QB, for sure. I think he’s got a real shot at a ring too.

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ah thanks ?

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I dream of Ginger has taken a wicked twist…I would be throwing up and crapping myself if I had Sam Darnold anywhere in my dreamscape. lol

I do hope you feel better soon!

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barfing while you shit yourself is an apt description of 85% of Darnold’s career

I think we can forgive the teams

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We all knew that he had something after his first career start :face_vomiting:

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Is it possible that college systems are increasing simple, compared to the molecular biology complications of NFL systems? These QB’s come out of places where their talent alone (and teammates talent) overcomes the wrong processes and reads they make. Then they hit the league where everyone on the opposing team was best player on his college team, or developed into an infinitely better player. And the coaching schemes are designed to constantly trick the QB’s into making mistakes.

Then you add on the draft, where even if the QB isn’t overly liked by the team, the rookie scale makes it worthwhile to at least give em a try.

:person_shrugging:

So maybe they’re just maturing later, and buying into coaching schemes that they never took to seriously at first.

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Fever dreams and explosive Diarrhea.

Those are two phrases I never expected as a title of a thread on the den. :joy:

Hope you are feeling better soon. But the thread title on mother’s day really had me laughing.

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I think that’s right.

And I wonder if you’ll see an adjustment (or not) based on this. If a QB has physical skill, and isn’t a complete ■■■■■■■ idiot, why give up? I get that ownership wants to win immediately, but you think of teams that could’ve been somewhere had they not just given it another season or two.

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Sometimes they have absolutely no ■■■■■■■ idea what they’re doing.

Sports GMs are not always that smart. Nico Harrison for the Dallas Mavericks (different sport but same concept) trading Luka Doncic was possibly the dumbest thing any team has ever done in any sport…but HE thought it was a good idea.

The Falcons gave Kirk Cousins $180M and then drafted Michael Penix…just to sign Tua Tagovailoa two years later.

Matt Millen drafted how many receivers in a row?

Experience ≠ Future Success

It would be difficult for a fan to run a team successfully, but it would not be difficult for fans to make decisions as bad as some ACTUAL sports executives.

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I’ve always said that any of us could’ve GM’d this team to an 0-16 season.

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I actually think any of us could GM us to win about 25% of our games, given the parity in the NFL. Going 4-12 (or 4-13 these days) is clearly not that hard for the worst NFL teams and worst executives to do.

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Tom Hanks Running GIF

That was me a few days ago after taco bell

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https://youtube.com/shorts/lAJH3uIBZ00?si=XnOvug5UCsJut6Gf

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Did you say Justin Fields, @Nate, that fever has caused delusion, call 911… :innocent:

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So this may hurt but honestly most of the employees (coaches and players) are not well educated.

It is a product of the whole system. The best athletes get allowed to float and not enough push themselves or are pushed to become well educated and rounded.

I am talking pure melon horse power. ARSB should not be a top 30 WR in the league. He just shouldn’t. Tom Brady should have never made in the league truth be told.

The fact that so many “smart” guys do so well and beat out so many more athletically gifted players tells you that a huge number of player are meat heads.

And it trickles into many of the coaches.

Then you get to the front office and it is just like hiring CEOs most are just cronies or buddies in the system. It is hard to find truly competent front office people in any business but the NFL seems to have a ton of bad ones. Imagine a Billion Dollar company hiring a CEO without an MBA or more education. Yes you don’t need paper to be good but it helps to be educated and trained to analyze and solve problems.

Holmes is murdering the league with his drafting so far.

So to act like it is at all surprising that org after org would not be able to utilize a guy like Sam Donald should not be surprising at all.

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Sounds like you had an unscheduled free darkness retreat.

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Doug Flutie!?!

JACK FOX!!!

If Miami doesn’t ruin him… Malik Willis

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Now what if you would have had your new puppy with ya? Tooootally different experience.

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I’d have the baldest team ever assembled. We would start a trend of winning… In handsomeness throughout the entire nation. Biggest fan base any team has ever seen before.

And that’s not even talking about the multiple multiple Super Bowls

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