Why do Swedish battleships have big QR codes on them?
So they can scan da navy in.
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Why is cunnilingus like working for the mafia?
One slip of the tongue and you’re in deep shit.
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Some of them are are weird uncle jokes.
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What does a 9 volt battery and a butt hole have in common?
Jman knows he ain’t supposed to put his tongue on them but does it anyways.
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I thought that was the guy that had an extreme underbite, this tastes like shit!
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We were given a parrot named Polly.
All Polly did was swear.
Our pastor and his wife were coming over for dinner, so we told Polly she had to be good tonight. She refused and started swaring even more, so my wife put her in the freezer. While preparing dinner my wife heard the bird pleading to be let out. She opened the freezer and asked if she would stop swearing? Polly said yyyyes, aannndd stuttering from cold, “mmiigt ii askkk what the ttturkey diiid?”
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I prefer Petey!
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A woman was in bed with her lover when she heard her husband opening the front door… “Quick, jump out the window,” she says to him… “What???, the guy says, “we’re on the 13th floor!” She says… “ just jump, this is no time to be superstitious!”
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It’s restin’…
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LIE
I’ve never licked a battery in my life
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Overheard Bols talking to his Dr the other day…
“Where specifically does it hurt?”
“Right around the entrance”
"Yeah well that’s the exit. As long as you think it’s an entrance, it’ll continue to
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I had sex with a blind woman, she said I was the biggest she ever felt.
I said, you’re pulling my leg.
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Page 26
Miss whatever city 2025
A straight 260 pound UNIT that they say is beautiful
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I was banned from Yellowstone after some unfortunate events that included swimming nude in the Mammoth hot springs, drinking in a closed area…blah, blah, blah but I would like to add I was the only one who wasn’t an employee of the park at the time of the shenanigans. Anyway, this is funny…
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It’s funny that we hear a lot about women’s hormonal stuff. I am typically attracted to tall, slim women. But… sometimes I’m all about voluptuous types. I wonder if that’s when my sperm count is optimal for making babies. I have noticed that this comes and goes. I didn’t say any of this, you did.
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